Hey what’s up guys? I hope you all are doing extremely well 🙂
This post will not be about makeup or anything similar, it’s actually about something that really bothers me sometimes and i’m sure i’m not the only one.
Today I thought i’d make a post, discussing about one of my worst flaw, as a human being, because that’s very interesting to talk about (haha) 😀
So as you can tell by the title, this post is going to be about jealousy.
Jealousy is, I think, one of the worse feelings in the world, because no one, obviously what’s to be jealous. And I would call myself extremely jealous, BUT difference between acting on my jealousy and just feeling it, is that I know that this jealousy is just in my head. I know that there is nothing else and that’s why it sucks even more, because my brain knows that is not real, but I feel it anyway.
The root of my jealousy is insecurity, which is for a lot of people. It’s just based in insecurity and not feeling good enough and not feeling that you worth and just really depressing emotions like that.
And the jealousy is often in the root of the fear. If you are jealous, you need to find what that fear is. Most of, I guess, is the fear of being left by your partner, and for me, the fear is just not being enough, not being able to give my boyfriend everything he ever wanted and I just think that there are a lot of people in the universe that can give him what he wants. And that this person on the street down there can give him more then I could. And that’s the feeling that I have to deal with all the time.
Since I know that this is just a ”fantasy”, it’s just in my head, I don’t let it affect anything, like I would never tell my boyfriend not to go out or not to do this or not to do that because i’m jealous. Because it’s me, it’s not him, he is never giving me a reason to be jealous, so when you let it affect your relationship and your partner start changing just to ‘help’ your jealousy, that doesn’t actually help anything at all. A lot of things make me extremely jealous, but I know that is just my insecurity talking, and I don’t want my partner to change anything, because I know that’s not realistic, in this way.
But, of course, if your partner is flirting with everyone he/ she meets, and you don’t like that, then of course you have to have a conversation about that. But if there’s nothing in reality that gives you a reason to feel this way you shouldn’t let it affect your relationship.
And that’s the hard part, because, just because it’s not real, doesn’t mean it makes emotions not real. I hope you get what i’m trying to say.
I just really hate jealousy, and it sucks so hard and I don’t know why am I so insecure. This whole post is no reflection of my boyfriend. This has nothing to do with him, it only has to do with me, because, these are feeling that are inside of me and how insecure I am and how scared I am to not be able to be perfect. But that’s the way I feel now, since we are not that long together, I’m sure I’ll become more confident and calm in the future.
I don’t know how to deal with this and I don’t know how to stop these feelings, but if you guys have any tips that helped you then comment below, I would be happy to read them. 🙂
I just felt like I wanted to share this with you all and maybe some of you feel the same way, and we can feel that way together 😀
Stay positive and don’t forget to smile!
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